My Blog

out came a mobile phone from the trouser pocket. an unread message from an unlisted number began flashing. a long smile unconsciously carving my face as i read it.

"sino yan, kabit mo?"

mrs ash was sitted on my right while i was driving the after office rush hour traffic. she saw my fixation over what the phone's lcd screen had to display. instead of the road ahead.

"oo. si number three."

i turned my head in her direction and winked as our eyes met. she seemed unwary with the reply.

the next move was a calculated scheme.

"honey," now speaking on a more subdued tone, "can i play badminton tonight?"

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there's only one finger less than a handful of people in this world who's an elbow tag with sam. and unlikely not a finger more to add. people who sees the lil boy sam and not the sam covered in ash's drag.

until early this year, ash was adamant at keeping sam a closed book. happily minding his own business. the few moments that sam was loosely in control, ie alone scouting the internet, he happened to saw ex-blog jock B's nook. this jock's mi ultimo adios caught sam's attention, so a few open ended questions were fielded.

this jock replied.

and so started a flurry of conversation. the jock has his issue then, and sam was all ears appreciating the dynamics of this chats PLU bill. sam had his own barrage of issues with mrs ash too, as would any couple would endure. and the jock knew how to listen and play mr phil.

before the ex-blogger made his periodic disappearing act, he tendered a soiree of sorts for sam with two others of this same class - jock Y and jock T. comrades jock B also met in the confines of his ex-blog. who jock b knew he can trust. for this lil sam was a naked mustard seed too fragile to let loose on open crust.

and the last counted finger. then the subject of the jock B's inspiration. as he talked about him night and day. his playboy bunny.

so this went on for a few weeks. or months. merrily chatting without the need (and the risk) of disclosing the ash this world sees. this bunch became sams council of nicea. feeding him with the tricks of trade, the rules of engagement. not that sam was likely to engage this freedom. a few more YM ID's sam also got along well with, as there was no need to stag a berlin wall when all they see is an avatar to read.

soon enough, the confines of the world wide web became too short a runway for this Y, L, B and sam to stray. one damn good pretty night to unwind, sam took further his first coming out and had a round of lite with jock Y. a milestone in sam's, and especially ash's right. the next revelation became easier with jock's L and then M.

three warm-blooded jocks whom sam found his circle of trust. often with dinners, and a few out of town sorties. the bug is now to unleash sam without mrs ash making a know-how. either a night or a weekend-long flight.

and now at thirty, sam makes note, that eyeballs aren't after all about sex. and with this fate, sam is, and will likely be fulfilled, at being just a virgin.

graffiti carved for the rock stars.